Saturday, November 14, 2009

Is it appropriate to get a small gift for the older sibling of a birthday baby?

We're going to a small birthday gathering for a lady from church whose baby is turning 1. She also has a daughter who will be 4 in December. Would it be appropriate to get a small gift for the older sibling. And by small I mean like a cheapy $1 princess jewelry set from the dollar store or something. My husband says "no, just get a gift for the 1 year old. Kids need to learn they can't always get gifts at a birthday party." Besides, my almost 3 year old is friends with the almost 4 year old so I thought it would be kind of cool for my daughter to give something to her. Appropriate or not?

Is it appropriate to get a small gift for the older sibling of a birthday baby?
Ahhhhhh, I have mixed feelings on this.





I have done it, because the older sibling feels left out of all the attention devoted to the baby, but it does spoil them, and they do have to learn that everything is not always about them.





Maybe stop when the older child hits 6 or 7?
Reply:We do in my family until they are 6. Some kids just don't understand why they don't get something to. Its just easier to avoid a problem if they have a little something to.
Reply:Yes I think that's a great Idea
Reply:I usually do if it's a friend or a relative they have done it for me. Young kids don't really understand why the sibbling is getting all the goodies it helps make the other sibbling feel special too.
Reply:NOOOOOOO...i would not cause its not her special day, its the babies and if u do that it is not ok. if presents are givin to that child then as the years pass the child will expect that and the younger child will eventually realise that its their special day and get their feelins hurt if the see the othe child getting presents too!!! not to mention u will be setting that older child up to be a brat as the years pass...and im sure the older child will soon realise what happens on someones b day
Reply:It sounds appropriate. At that age, the sibling might not understand about when to get a special present, and she might feel a bit jealous. At least to show that you're thinking about her too, not leaving her out, it would be a nice gesture!





About your idea of your daughter giving the sibling that gift, or even if you both gave her the gift, it sounds really sweet!
Reply:nope only time to give the sibling a gift is when the baby comes home from the hospital its the 1 year olds birthday not the 4 year olds
Reply:I say appropriate but I would check with the parents of the child in question.They may have mixed feelings.
Reply:I see how you can have mixed feelings with this one, as an only child I never had that sibling jealousy. BUT as an adult I always try and remember the other child, and I never spend nearly as much money as I do on the "birthday gift". what I have done is whisper to the other child that I have a gift for them too, and when the timing is right give it to her/him. or give it to the parent, and let them decide when to give the gift.


Kids are kids, and who wouldnt love a gift just cause! and as a child if your parents explained to you that the gifts are going to be for your sibling, and all of a sudden there is one there for you too, how exciting is that?!
Reply:Not. It's not the 4 year old's birthday. It's a sweet thought but I wouldn't do it. Little kids need to learn that they get presents on their birthday and other kids get presents on their birthdays. When I was little my parents used to give my other siblings little gifts when it was one of our birthdays so I began to think that that was the way it was at other birthdays. I would pitch fits at other kids birthdays cause I thought I would get presents too.(keep in mind I was about 4) So yea. Bad idea.
Reply:I have to agree with your husband. Kids are brats these days and need to learn that they aren't entitled to gifts and goodies on every occasion (it's not all about them all the time). That said, your generosity is impressive, and it was kind of you to think of the other child. But don't do it! Listen to your hubby; he's right.
Reply:sure,why not.
Reply:Yes it is appropriate.It helps the older sibling to not be jealous of the younger sibling. So go ahead and buy the big sister a present. I ALWAYS buy my little cousins something when one of them are having a birthday party, that way the younger ones, or the older ones, do not feel left out, or wonder why one is opening presents, and not them.
Reply:I would.... My kids got presents at the baby shower along with the stuff for the baby. Although at our partys I give party bags out to all the other children so they don't get another present. But since she is the big sister... why not give her a "Good job on her first year of being the big sister award"/gift.


Good Luck


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